Too much going wrong in my life, I have reached the end of the line, i really, really, want to die now,why me? What did i do to deserve this?

To list a few: Previously abusive absentee parent. Brother is mildly handicapped, thinks I am his only real friend (I dread seeing him). Also I am pretty sure there is a family conspiracy for me to care for him full time (I can't care for him, I can barely function myself) I have been bullied right into my thirties by several people because of my looks. (This includes mob bullying) I have a large bulbous ******* head I have erectile dysfunction No woman has shown interest in me in years I have internal piles I have no job and little money, I think welfare wants to cut me off. I hate where I live, it's depressing. People don't take me seriously and ignore my pain (they know I am in it but just think I am in a bad mood) I have a **** memory and because of this people presume I am useless at everything. Every day I just want to sleep, I have started hating the general public, I see hardly any good in people anymore.