How do you know if your mother loves you?

Like she does everything. A mother does, and she's a really good friend to talk to. I talk to her about everything and she always wants me to hug her and spend time with her and stuff, even though we sometimes get in arguments. But my mind is messed up, thinking that she is calling em handsome a lot, but I think I'm average or not so good looking, just to make me fill better and I hate feeling like that because that makes me want to kill myself. My aunties say I'm beautiful (I'm a guy though lol) and my dad says I'm handsome and most people in my family say I'm handsome and stuff but never a girl that's not family said that. Do my mom say that to make me fill better because if ya true I'm killing myself tomorrow