Question #12650622

I'm 19 years old severely depressed and horrible anxiety please help i beg you.?

Hey i'm 19 years old i've been bullied severely since 6th,7th,8th,9th,10th,11th,12th grade;I was never the cool kid i wanted to stay away from all the trouble during middle school but that all changed first day people made fun of my head size it wasnt in proportion with my body at the time so i got called all sorts of names also i dealt with and still do deal with severe acne all over my face and espcially my back and chest,I always sense a feel of guilt and worthlessness all the time i cry because i can't see someone i have no job,no source of income,no friends im a loser and i always think about killing myself so i can end all of this pain but i'm afraid i'll hurt others even more,I always stay in my comfort zone always stay inside on the computer everyday and sleep and wake up and do the same thing i've bene doing this for he past 4 years and this is also another reason for the leading causes of my health issues form staying on a pc that much,All the bullies i know have their lifes already good have apartments good jobs friends etc... while i stay at home everyday and never do anything i wasted all my life of my teenage years inside playing games as an escape to hide from the public its very sad just recently i tryed hanging myself but i couldnt do it and i brought myself to a hospital to get help but i left there after two days because i couldnt handle it there it was a scary place,I always get a sense if somene is looking at me in their mind their making fun of me so i run stay inside i don't know what to do anymore i dont have a support system people say they care but i feel diffrent no one seemed to care until i was in a hospital i'm always down and depressed i just need someone to talk to.

2013-12-21 16:34:19

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