Emetophobia?

I am a 15 year old boy. I suffer from a quite unknown phobia. This phobia is the fear of vomiting. I have rarely been able to fully enjoy the life I lead, because this phobia holds me back. Many people just say, "you just have to realize there's nothing you can do when you will throw up", but it just doesn't help. I just hate this life. Sometimes when im going to vomit I don't know whether to cry, scream, or just put a bullet in my head. I would rather die than throw up, that's how awful I have it. Does anyone else have this phobia and how did you cope with it. I don't want to fight this phobia, I want to make it not be there. I want to be able to feel like I'm going to throw up and just go above the toilet and do it. Please help.